I have NEVER done this before, but this book is so batshit insane, I have to. In the 52 pages I've read so far, he has ranted about everything from George Clinton's bands Parliament and Funkadelic to the "mentally handicapped" who bag groceries, but he's reached a soaring new height of madness here on page 53.
"The never ending shit-sprawl (I know it's crude, but really is there any other word?) of meaningless product, the movement of that product, and the ultimate disposal of the product for no good reason other than human failure is in itself what it means to live in a "consumer driven" economy.
Do people on antidepressants shop less?"
Wow, buddy! Do people on antipsychotics write less? This all gives me great hope for my own (fantasy) writing career. I really wonder what kind of edit job they're doing on this (I'm reading an ARC). If this is published as is, something is truly rotten in the state of Denmark.
(Up to page 58 and ) UNBELIEVABLY, this book has become even more WOW.
"While it's no secret that men's penises are responsible for lots of bad purchases, sometimes it's the need to avoid confrontation that feeds it as well."
Is that even a sentence? I would die if someone wanted me to diagram that. (Ps. It's about a local sandwich shop in his town, where the owner/operator is supposedly a hottie- although he disagrees- "she was not all that attractive, but she flirted with the factory workers".
I bet she didn't flirt with him, the jealous lout.
OMG. Page 61. I am going to make EVERYONE read this book. Dude is out of his mind.
"I don't have statistics on how many Cheesecake Factory hostesses end up working as prostitutes after their illustrious careers are cut short, but I have a feeling it's pretty high."
(page 68!!!) I might be obsessed, but this author certainly is. Damn, what did the hostess at the Cheesecake Factory do to him???
"Alcoholic drama-queen slut-in-dead-end-town hostess, please fetch the 17-year-old part-timer who spends al of his spare time fantasizing about you while masturbating instead of doing his homework so he may bring us an outrageously overpriced slice of your inest previously-frozen shipped-in-from and out-of state-factory namesake desert at once!...
Excuse me, did I call her a slut? I forgot this was a small town what with the big city restautant and all; I meant to say "popular"- thank you. ...
...I venture to say this is the first time that a book about economics has called anyone a slut and that may be the precise problem here with out economy."
Hot diggity damn, man. This guy is all fired up. If he can get published with this racist, able-ist, slut-ist bull, I should be able to get published.
Yee haw.
I cannot put this thing down. And I can't stop typing. His madness has infected me!
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